some strange music draws me in

On the last day of term, Cornell hosts a spring fling sort of thing. My impulse is to duck and hide. I hate that kind of sanctioned bullshit fun. So I've been thinking a lot on what it means to be in a "surveyed party." Last night over beers at pixel with F, we started talking about Adorno and the demarcation between work and free time. He spoke about the theoretical concept of free time with a lot of vengeance.

At the same time, he was clearly using this "free time" and hands with a lot of impunity. I drove him home in the rain. We left after I begged him to get out of my car, and almost physically pushed him out. There is nothing more disappointing than realizing you can never be safe with friends you think you were safe with.